Ftw - articles

The Oompa Loompa Liberation Movement Has Its Own Woody Guthrie

Since Roald Dahl published Charlie and the Chocolate Factory in 1964, kids, adults, and comrades alike have questioned the ethics of the Oompa Loompas. Where did they come from? How are they paid? Do they have a union?

Wild Child Transfixed by Sydney Sweeney on 'Hot Ones'

Some kids need a blanket to calm down. Others need a teddy bear. All this kid needs is Sydney Sweeney.

‘Now That’s Metal’: Florida Man Jams Out to System of a Down While Undergoing Brain Surgery

No matter how metal you think you are, you’ll never be as metal as Christian Nolen, a guitar-wielding rocker who turned his brain surgery into a hardcore jam session.

The Pope Says Gettin’ Off is a ‘Gift from God’

Continuing his streak of saying unusually cool stuff, the Pope Francis has decided to let the world know that he believes sexual pleasure is a “gift from God,” although he was quick to follow that up with the recommendation that it be “disciplined with pa

A Disappearance Expert Tells Us How to Log Off for Good

It doesn’t need to be said at this point, but the internet is overwhelming.

Extreme Bearded Bengals Fan is the Final Boss of NFL Fans

One Cincinnati Bengals fan recently proved that sports face painting is so much more than a bygone art.

‘Without Context This Is Terrible’: Fashion Designer’s Funeral Has Guests Serving the Catwalk

For most people, funerals are a somber affair.

‘He Got Them!’: Cops Fail to Catch Lane-Splitting Motorcyclist Despite Stopping An Entire Highway

As we’ve previously noted, lane-splitting is a pretty bad idea.

‘10/10 Technique No Notes’: Driver Plays Highway Bowling With Open Car Door and Traffic Cones

Video games give you unrealistic expectations about driving.

Michael Myers TikTok Challenge Tests People on Their Horror Movie Preparedness

It’s almost Halloween, which means people on TikTok are engaging in necromancy and bringing a trend back from the dead: the Michael Myers challenge.

'Why Her Legs Ain’t Moving': Internet Marvels at Old Woman’s Ass Shaking Talents at a Samba Show

A former hot girl doesn’t just die. One woman observing street samba dancers shows how those skills are not gone, just dormant.

Witness an A.I. Laser Robot That Wages Genocide on Weeds

Enter NBC News’ Tech Correspondent Jacob Ward, who shared a fascinating look at a surprisingly useful “killer robot” on TikTok. Ward opens the video by asking, “You want to see a robot that kills weeds with lasers?”

‘How Do You Even Practice for This?’: Man Spins Flat-Screen TV on His Finger in ‘You Break It, You Buy It’ Defying Stunt

Forget a basketball, Utah-based influencer, @davidklemczak3 has managed to figure out how to spin an entire flat-screen TV on his finger.

Guessing Random 'White Girl Names' The Key To Landing Clothing Discounts, According To Viral TikTok Hack

Earlier this summer, creator @allymaz26 shared her secret fast fashion shopping hack – arbitrarily guessing names when it comes time to check out.

'Day 13 of Trying to Buy the Yellow Divider': One Guy's Quest to Buy A Yellow Divider From Every Major Grocery Retailer

Those yellow things that divide groceries on the supermarket conveyor belt can be quite useful, especially when it comes to making sure you don’t pay for other people's groceries. But can you buy one?

We Talked to the Guy Who Had No Idea He Lives in Carmy's Apartment from 'The Bear'

The Bear season 2 was released on June 22 much to the delight of women thirsting for line cooks, Chicagoans, and Hulu, who released data showing a 70% uptick in viewership compared to season 1.

Looking For a Summer Job? US Mailboat Tryouts Are Back

Running the paper route has long been a summer job of choice for youths around the country.

Real Life 747 Pilot Destroys Clueless TikTokers Giving False Advice

This real-life pilot rips apart some of the dumbest things ever uttered by a human being relating to airplanes.

Jenna Jameson Has Finally Found Her One and Only Podcast Influencer True Love

Great news for all the gay girls this pride month: Jenna Jameson is officially on our team.

'I'll Do It For Free': The TikToker Doing Free Yard Work to Promote His Landscaping Business

Spencer (@SBmowing on TikTok) is promoting his landscaping business by lending a hand to homeowners with overgrown lawns, offering to mow and take care of their yard work for free.

Nobody Fucks Like This Arcade’s ‘Time Crisis’ Wizard

Jason Bourne, you’ve got some real life-competition.

Eve 6 Has the Best Punishment for When His Kids Don’t Do Their Chores

Nineties alt/rock band Eve 6, the masterminds behind such hits as Here's to the Night, Inside Out, and Anytime, may have just perfected the art of punishing your child.

Madman Documents His Journey on r/CastIron of Adding 80 Layers of Seasoning to One Pan

Leave it to someone on Reddit to find a way to be both incredibly creative, while pissing off everyone in their wake.

Man Rakes in $23K/Month Selling Bottled Burps Online

It seems as though there is no limit to how weird the internet can get. Especially in the age of adult content platforms like OnlyFans, viewers can pretty much pay for whatever they want (within reason.)

Future Homeowners In For Epic Surprise When Carpenter Hides Skeleton In Cabinet Space